Ten Things I’ve Learned About WoW

Lok’tar friends.

So today I thought I’d drop another quick list.  This was cobbled together a few weeks ago, but its made up of things that I learned as I played through wow.  Gear is like Cocaine. For some people, cocaine is a helluva drug, to quote the Chappelle show, and gear can be the same way. Some people do it for fun, but more often than not, gear, as cocaine, turns people into whores.

Us versus them. People who’ve only played one side of the game tend to buy into the idea that the factions are actually different. There are two views on this, though. The first is that the other faction is dirty and evil and filled with arse-chapeaus, which is generally spouted by those who’ve had bad experiences in pvp, where the other faction has acted like jerks a bit. The other group is those that have just had enough with the jerks on their own faction and feel their faction is filled with idiots while the other faction can work together and is superior and therefore must be better. Once you’ve played both sides, you’ll realize that the idiots are like the curse of flesh, their everywhere and affect everyone. That being said, both sides has its diamond’s in the rough.

There are two types of inexperienced players: newbs and noobs. While both words technically mean the same thing, there is a slight distinction. Newbs are players that are legitimately new to the game and just don’t have the years of experience that everyone else does. In time they will get that experience and stop being newbs. The second group, noobs, are the idiots and arse-chapeaus and morons. They are the players that either know better, should know better or just don’t care. They grief and cause grief to those people they are playing with. They may know how to play their class, but don’t bother to learn fights, or they may know fights but don’t bother to learn their class. These kind are everywhere.

Ignore and Report Spam are your friends. The ignore function is that friend that you’ve had around since grade school who you’ve fought with from time to time but always came back to in the end. The Report Spam button is your best friend in the whole world, the one that you’d do anything for all the time no matter what, except for maybe out and out betrayal, but you get the idea. Your ignore list is only so big. I reserve it for the repeat offenders. If I know there are a few uber-idiots that are always in trade chat, they make this list and almost never get taken off. In my experience there is always one or two on every server I’ve played on, and I can still remember the names of most of them. The report spam function is really for reporting spam, but it also has the function of ignoring the individual as well. I’m pretty sure it’s only a temporary ignore, but I’m not sure. The great thing about this is, if you want to overuse it, as I do, you can and it keeps idiots from annoying you, whether it’s with offensive language, rude behavior, or actual spamming.

Guildies can be fleeting but friendships are forever. I’ve been in several guilds since I joined wow and have made several friends that I consider best friends. We don’t always talk every day, but we stay in touch and enjoy playing the game with each other. When I’ve left the game, they’ve always been the reason I’ve come back. When I’ve left the guilds they are in and gone out in search of raiding or other nonsense, I’ve always gone back to whatever guild they are in, because they are who I want to spend my gaming time with.

Internet Dragons are cool. Because real dragons don’t exist, and dragons are cool, thus internet dragons are cool.

Class wars. Each class has a widely accepted nemesis, or at least each player who pvp’s with a class, generally finds there is at least one other class that can just get under their skin. It’s just the nature of trying to provide balance to the game in the only way they can: A beats B, who beats C, who beats D, who beats C, who beats A, who beats F, who beats B… etc. I’m sure someone somewhere has done a class comparison chart like this somewhere, although I’ve never seen one. Either way, these rivalries can be good for the game and you tend to find this out the more you play each class. For example, mages and warlocks have this eternal hatred of each other. Personally, I’ve found that there is a private rivalry between me (as a warrior) and every alliance hunter in existence. I’m not sure if I posted about this back in the day when I was levelling through BGs, but hunters always tried to kite me, and I always tried to catch them. The really good hunters tended to win more against me than I did them, while I tended to win more against the really bad hunters. The more hunters tried to kite me, the more I tried to prove that I could get in close and kill them. The more I tried to get in close and kill them, the more they tried to kite me. I love vicious circles, they’re so much better than tame ones.

Everyone has been fooled, no one was prepared and the billions upon billions of deaths were merely a setback; I for one welcome our future swine overlords. Everyone knows that Boars are the biggest, baddest and most dangerous threat that there is, or ever has been in the World (of Warcraft). Consider this: Everywhere you go, the boars are there. All the quest givers everywhere pay you to kill them, but no matter how many you kill they always come back in equal or greater numbers. It is only a matter of time before they revolt against this oppression. It is only a matter of time before they all rise up at once, overwhelming everyone, everywhere. In the end, we will all be rolling in the mud bowing to our new swine overlords.

Bloggers make the world go round. I’m not trying to toot my own horn here, what I do mean to say is that there are several influential bloggers out there that have been consistently correct, funny, up to date and verbose in this wonderful community and if it wasn’t for their inspiration, many of us wouldn’t stay as interested as we do, or we may have suffered severe withdrawal pains from not having wow stuff to read while at work. A special thanks to some of those who’ve been inspirations to me, thank you all for the inspiration and entertainment.

Cake really pisses Pie off.  If you’re talking to Pie, don’t mention cake.

So that’s what I’ve learned, everything else is just fluff, so keep on keeping on and,

Stay Hordecore.

— Fikkle


4 Responses to “Ten Things I’ve Learned About WoW”

  1. I support this post except the cake part.

    Cake is evil. And a lie…or the lie.

  2. Pies rule; cakes drool!

  3. Good points you make here. And 98% agree with them all, especially the ones about newbs vs. noobs.

  4. In regards to class warfare: I wish they’d bring that back to the what it was in vanilla. The distinctions between the classes was much stronger, and usually somewhat “unbalanced”. The response from blizz back then was “well, pvp is not balanced around duels or even small group (<5) pvp, it's balanced around battlegrounds" — paraphrasing of course. But then came arenas and "balance". Now I honestly can barely feel the difference between my destro lock and my fire mage. Every class pretty much has a counter to every other classes' abilities now. I dunno, I sometimes miss the unbalanced days. I was fine with the fact that I got destroyed by every single rogue out there because I could do the same to mages on my warlock.

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